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07 March 2011 @ 11:16 pm
I guess I'll be using this for my emo shit after all  
I feel like I have no one I can rely on anymore. I guess I got spoiled. I had someone I thought I could share anything with and, even though it turned out she wasn't the best person, it was a comfort to be able to share my troubles and pains without judgment. Even then I still had some people I could talk with about most things but, now that they're gone too, I have no one. Even the friends I've finally made now, I can't talk to them. I share things with them and it becomes about them or they don't care. I never knew I was such a needy person until this year. Its selfish of me, to want someone who will sit and listen to me whine. I whine far more than I should.

I just feel like I lost everything all at once and now I'm just kind of... here. Like I don't know what to do with myself or how to fully move on and pick myself up. I've tried and somehow, despite everything, I always fall back into this place. I guess in the end, I'm just some sort of big baby. I need to grow up and realize I may not ever be able to share everything with someone.

I know I'll hate myself as soon as I post this. I'm such a baby.